On Second thought, I was wrong. I was so wrong

“Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart” – Winnie the Pooh

On Sunday, we had planned on attending church in person for the first time since the pandemic. We even preregistered Ella for child care to make sure that we had a spot. One unfortunate consequence of the pandemic is that any time that you are sick, the rest of society can’t take a chance being within six feet of you because it might be coronavirus.

Well, Sunday morning we were sharing a family allergy attack that looked like we had scrambled eggs and COVID-19 for breakfast. We were sure that the church wouldn’t allow us inside because Ella was coughing up chunks of lung like someone who has been chain smoking since the Eisenhower administration, and my voice sounded like Christian Bales’ Batman doing an impression of Tone Loc.

So we had to watch church online, which meant not having to pack the family truckster and drive to church, and that gave me a little more time with my thoughts. I thought about the video of Audrey that I posted on Facebook last week (shown below).

I wrote “Taking some baby steps, literally and figuratively.” After thinking about it, I was wrong. I could not have been more wrong. People are probably tired of my writing about her two open-heart surgeries, nine other surgeries, and several other times when she has been under anesthesia. As if that wouldn’t make it difficult enough to think that she would ever walk, Audrey has another defect – she is missing part of her vestibular system. Semicircular canals are the fluid filled tubes in your ears that help you keep your balance. She doesn’t have them. It’s not as if hers are malfunctioning, she literally does not have them.

Everything I take for granted (walking, hearing, seeing, eating, breathing through my nose) is a monumental task for her.

I was so wrong. Those weren’t baby steps. Those were giant leaps, and they left permanent footprints on my heart.

There is one advantage to not having semicircular canals. The second video doesn’t do it justice, but when you are missing semicircular canals, you can spin around all day and never get motion sickness. In fact, CHARGE kids typically love spinning around, sometimes as fast as possible. When Audrey is old enough for Disney World, I’m calling dibs on the Mad Hatter Tea Party ride. Even though I will puke every time I ride it, I will ride with her as many times as she wants. If you are in the tea cup next to me, you better wear a pancho.