It Was the Best of People, It Was the Worst of People

I never would have imagined when I was reciting my lines using American Sign Language while performing “Children of a Lesser God” in high school that one day I would have to sign to communicate with my daughter. I hadn’t signed since high school, and surprisingly, it doesn’t stay with you. I think I had forgotten every word that I had ever learned. So, I took sign language classes at Audrey’s school last year, but I picked it up quickly.

Our instructor was about my age, and she said she learned sign language because there was a deaf girl in the school where she grew up. She said everyone in her class made fun of the girl, and nobody would talk to her so she had no friends. She sat in class with an interpreter, but none of the other kids tried to communicate with her. My instructor was not okay with that and decided she wanted to be friends with this girl. She started learning sign language by watching the interpreter during class and trying to memorize signs so she could speak with her new friend. One day, she walked up to her deaf classmate and tried to sign to her. The deaf girl laughed a little but appreciated the effort and ended up teaching her new friend sign language. They became friends and eventual roommates, and this wonderful person made her career as an interpreter for the hearing impaired.

She is the best of people.

One of the girls in our class was in fifth grade at the school where our lessons were being taught. She came to the class on her own accord because she had a deaf friend at the school, and she wanted to be able to communicate with her friend. She willingly gave up her Thursday nights to be a better friend to somebody, and her mother attended with her to support her daughter.

They are the best of people.

But when you spend time with the deaf community, you sometimes hear stories about the worst of people, and it goes deeper than the kids who made fun of a deaf girl. We began the first class by going around and introducing ourselves. We simply gave our names and why we were there. When I introduced myself, I said I was there because I wanted to be able to communicate with my daughter.

The instructor said, “It’s so great that you are here.”

I said, “No, it’s not great. I have to be here, and I want to be here. I want to communicate with my little girl. Learning how to communicate with someone is the least you can do to build a relationship. It’s not great. It’s just what you do.”

The instructor said, “You would be surprised how many parents of deaf children never learn sign language.”

I said, “What, seriously? How do they talk to their children”

She said that they don’t. She said they have students at the school who beg to stay at school after classes because they do not want to go home. Their parents won’t talk to them at home, so they would rather stay at school with people who will take the time to at least communicate with them.

I try really hard not to judge or criticize other people, especially other parents, but I’m going to fail on this one.

It’s probably not fair to call those parents “the worst of people.” I don’t have any idea what is going on in their world, and there are people in this world performing atrocities on a much larger scale.

The best of people. The worst of people.

Maybe those parents don’t belong in the second group, but they certainly don’t belong in the first group.