Vacation Diary Day 3: Boingy Boingy

I woke up early on the second day, and I knew right away, it was going to be a challenging day.  I went out to our veranda to see the sunrise, and I saw 4-5 foot whitecapped waves as far as I could see.  Michelle and Ella get motion sickness, so patches were installed behind their ears, and Dramamine was administered. 

This is one area (and maybe the only one) where I don’t have to worry about Audrey. When we learned that she didn’t have a vestibular system, the doctors told us that she couldn’t get motion sickness.  I guess it is impossible for the fluid in your semicircular canals to get out of whack when you do not have semicircular canals. 

Every time the boat swayed, Audrey just giggled and laughed. I expected nothing less. She has faced much bigger waves than that in her life, and she has always met them with giggles and laughs. Why would this be different, even if she could get motion sickness?

On our first morning on the boat, Ella got to experience a breakfast buffet for the first time.  When we walked into the breakfast buffet on our first morning, the mad rush of humanity rushing toward the food was stronger than the winds swaying our boat.

And who could blame us?  Everyone aboard that boat knew that the best way to start a vacation day is with a 9,000 calorie breakfast containing the four vacation breakfast food groups recommended by every U.S. Olympic Team nutrition coach – processed carbs, fatty port meat, syrup, and powdered eggs.

Despite having to deal with the crowd, Ella was a big fan of the buffet. “All the bacon I can eat? I think I could get used to this,” she said. And boy, did she. I don’t know how many pounds of bacon she ate on the cruise, but I’m pretty sure she left the boat with a cholesterol level closing in on 4000.

And the calorie consumption does not taper off throughout the day, at least not on a Disney Cruise.  While hanging out on the pool deck and finishing her fourth slice of free pizza, Ella said, “I wish I could have more ice cream, but I know I can’t.”

“Why can’t you have more?  It is free, sweetheart.” I replied

“I’ve already had three ice cream cones today, Daddy. I can’t have four.”

I showed her how the Hunts do vacation as I came back with four ice cream cones, two for her and two for me.  I taught my daughter two valuable lessons from the Jackie Hunt School of Food Economics.  First, when ice cream is free, there is no limit to how much you can eat each day.  Second, when it says “all you can eat,” you better eat all you can eat. 

For the rest of the cruise, I had to model the proper behavior to ensure she fully understood Jackie’s teachings. I showed her the four non-breakfast vacation food groups: red meat, ice cream, alcohol, and ice cream. Knowing that she was underage, we just substituted an extra serving of ice cream for her to replace the alcohol. Seeing how an adult male needs about 2000-2500 calories a day to survive, I had already stored enough calories by day 2 of the trip to last me until mid-summer 2073.

The water was pretty rough all day, and Ella said she didn’t like it when the ship went boingy-boingy, but my little trooper rallied and wanted to see the show that night.  The performers who gave us a Broadway show experience amazed me even more this time.  I don’t know how you rehearse the choreography in a way to simulate the ship swaying as much as we experienced, but there was nary a stumble or missed beat throughout the entire show.

Whenever I thought the Disney staff couldn’t impress me more, they always found a way to kick it up a notch.