Stop, Thief!

For a girl who was never supposed to walk, Audrey gets around really well now. She runs around the house (sometimes at full speed), and she rarely falls anymore. She never has to use her walker, and her mobility has given her a new sense of independence. She climbs the stairs by herself and can reach things on shelves and counters.

We were told this is good for her development because now Audrey is able to explore her surroundings. The problem is that she likes to take her surroundings with her.

She has turned into the most adorable little kleptomaniac.

I know it’s not intentional, so I’m not going to press charges. She will grab something to examine and play with, and inadvertently take it with her until she sets it down, only God knows where. I know that when we move out of this house, we will find a stash of Airpods, remote controls, computer mice, and various other objects that haven’t been reported missing yet.

I have found my AirPods on the kitchen counter, inside a candle holder, and inside her mouth. Luckily, AirPods will beep when you try to find them. Unfortunately, most kitchen utensils do not.

I can’t get mad at her because she doesn’t know what she is doing and because she’s so cute, but it can be frustrating. Try to change the channel on the TV without a remote control? Frustrating. About to hop on a Zoom meeting for work and can’t find your mouse? Frustrating.

I was making dinner one night last week, and for the life of me, I could not find the kitchen strainer. I was positive that I put it right next to the sink, but it wasn’t there. “Where the heck did I put it?” I thought to myself. Then, I walked over to the couch and saw my little angel chewing on the strainer with a huge smile on her face.

Now, every day we play several rounds of our new, fun, family game “Did I forget where I put it, or did Audrey take it?” Sometimes a full round of play might take an hour because I honestly don’t know if I simply forgot where I put something, which is highly likely these days. Some rounds end in a draw because, after an intensive search, I still don’t know the answer, and those rounds will only be scored when we move out and find her stash.

Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go find where I put my reading glasses, or . . .